DIARY OF THOUGHTS

I lost my mood.
I swear to God I lost my groove.
My pen went dry and mind went on snooze.
I lost the love for what I loved the most.
My mind was faraway thinking about who I loved the most.
That's me, and it's not a thumbs down to the woman I'm in love with, it's just that I was in that type of zone where it seemed like it was me versus everybody.
Figuratively beaten up, my clothes torn and nose were bloody.
My mind was frozen, these past days have been the coldest.
Angry at everything and furious at everyone, all of it has been so topsy-turvy.
With each passing day it seems I go a level lower in this depression.
Fighting to satisfy the world, dem troway face go one side like sey i no dey leave any lasting impressions.
Hence this is me being saddened by the fact that I let these things get to me.
I'm in a fist fight with myself like XXX in that SAD video.
My pupils are dilated and of course it's clear that I'm high.
High on this dysfunctional drug called pain.
There is no gain in brooding but you can tell that to my feet which are afraid of the size of the shoes they are about to fill.
My mind doesn't feel at home no more.
It's all panicky, scrambling door to door looking for a place where it can lay safely.
Suddenly my body gave up because my psyche couldn't find its safety.
I would float through hours. ghosting through days because finally everything seemed sour.
In truth all year it's been a bout and a battle.
Relapse and recovery, this back and forth seeming like I've been playing Eminem's albums all year long.
Every song telling a story of how I've fought, won and lost.
Finally I'm back and everything seems on track.
Sometime in the nearest future I might crack and I might loose my way again.
It is clear now , that each time I wrestle him and I lose, the next time I come out alot more stronger than I once was.

Teaching mirabella new skills 6

Slowly I started to rub lower down her front, tracing the contour of her bra under her top and I felt her body start to tremble. I held my breath and without pausing I deftly undid the button of her blouse, and then the next one. Mirabella didn't stop me. Continuincg down I undid all remaining buttons on her silk blouse and I returned to stroking her soft and sensitive skin.

TMANS 5

I  paused for a moment to watch her. She was slightly bent forward over my table with her long hair cascading from her head. I smiled as one of my dreams popped back into my head and I felt my cock swelling, but then I remembered that this was real life.

TMANS 4

She seemed to calming down a bit now, I turned round and started to make the coffee for Mirabella whilst trying to find out what was wrong with her tonight. "How come you don't have your key, Mirabella?"

"Oh, I wasn't going to be home so early because I'd gone out to a party and my parents weren't picking me up until eleven. But I had to leave early."

TMANS 3

Her long hair cascaded from her head to just below her shoulders and she was wearing a tight blouse with the top two buttons undone, revealing her cleavage and a white lace bra. Her skirt was a short flowing skirt that stopped a few inches above her knees. Her legs were bare and she was wearing a high heeled shoe.

I realized I was staring for too long, and looking up and down at her sexy body, but she didn't seem to notice. Mirabella just stood there looking upset.

Teaching mirabelle a new skill 2

Having the Russells move in next to me was good, Soon enough me and Mirabella got along and we really liked each other.

Teaching mirabelle a new skill 1

It was four months ago when my new neighbors moved in. I was used to the neighboring house being empty since the previous occupants had moved out a few months earlier,I went out to meet Mr and Mrs Russell when they first arrived and we seemed to get on well, although that wasn't too much of a surprise However it was Mr and Mrs Russell's daughter who caught most of my attention when she arrived the following day after they moved in.

My deisre 3

That soft slide, crazy inching, queer twists,

Everything driving me insane.

The way you fill me up, the way i scream your name, I don’t ever want to let you go.

I’m going insane on you and I don’t ever want to wake from this place.

Your arms, my home, my solace and my desire.

My desire 2

Slight pucker of your lips,

Soft tender feels,

Shivers when you place them on me,

And you lick down my spine,

My desire 1

The feel of your hands around me,

I don’t want you to leave,

You’re my masterpiece.

TEACHING MIRABELLA A NEW SKILL. 🔞🍆👅💦

It was four months ago when my new neighbors moved in. I was used to the neighboring house being empty since the previous occupants had moved out a few months earlier,I went out to meet Mr and Mrs Russell when they first arrived and we seemed to get on well, although that wasn't too much of a surprise However it was Mr and Mrs Russell's daughter who caught most of my attention when she arrived the following day after they moved in. Mirabella was just a couple of months past her eighteenth birthday and was an incredibly sexy yet innocent looking girl. She was light skinned like her mother and wore wonderfully light and short skirts that showed off her long smooth legs. Mirabella was really pretty with her mother's blue eyes and her tight tops clearly demonstrated that she had young and firm breasts.Having the Russells move in next to me was good, Soon enough me and Mirabella got along and we really liked each other.

It was about 8pm and I was just finishing up some work I had brought home when my doorbell rang. When I answered my door I was surprised to find Mirabella standing there, and she was obviously upset. Her eyes were red and slightly puffy and she seemed out of breath. However this was at complete odds with the rest of her look, she was dressed up to be obviously sexy. Her long hair cascaded from her head to just below her shoulders and she was wearing a tight blouse with the top two buttons undone, revealing her cleavage and a white lace bra. Her skirt was a short flowing skirt that stopped a few inches above her knees. Her legs were bare and she was wearing a high heeled shoe.

I realized I was staring for too long, and looking up and down at her sexy body, but she didn't seem to notice. Mirabella just stood there looking upset.

"Hello Mirabella, what's up?", "Would you like to come in?"

"Yes please, Mark," she quickly answered, "I'm locked out of my house. Mum and Dad are out until later and I don't have my key."

I gestured for her to come into the house, 

"Let me get you a drink Mirabella, and please sit down."

"Thank you Mark, I really need a drink. Can I have a coffee?"

She seemed to calming down a bit now, I turned round and started to make the coffee for Mirabella whilst trying to find out what was wrong with her tonight. "How come you don't have your key, Mirabella?"

"Oh, I wasn't going to be home so early because I'd gone out to a party and my parents weren't picking me up until eleven. But I had to leave early."

"Why did you have to leave?" I asked her.

"Oh, boyfriend trouble. It is just..." and she left her sentence hanging in the air.

The way she said it suggested to me that she wanted someone to talk to, and whilst I didn't really want to talk about her boyfriend.

"Here's your coffee Mirabella, and have you told your parents that you left the party early?"

"No, not yet." She grasped the coffee mug and cupped her hands round it, warming them up. I noticed that she had painted her fingernails a bright red.

I  paused for a moment to watch her. She was slightly bent forward over my table with her long hair cascading from her head. I smiled as one of my dreams popped back into my head and I felt my cock swelling, but then I remembered that this was real life.

I paused while I thought. I looked at pretty young Mirabella sitting across the table from me, her ample breasts pushing against her silk blouse and my eyes were drawn to the soft skin of her cleavage. I made up my mind: I wasn't going to let this opportunity go to waste. She might be tired, sad and vulnerable but all that meant was that now was the time to seduce this lovely girl. My cock stirred at the thought of taking Mirabella but I knew I had to get this right.

"Mark could you please help massage my shoulders a little bit?, am really stressed out." 

 I moved behind her and I gently stroked her shoulders, rubbing her tense muscles.

 Slowly, however, I could feel her shoulders starting to move and relax and then I heard the click as she placed her cup on the table in front of her. While I massaged her shoulders I bent and pulled her silky blonde hair back from her soft neck before placing my lips against her lovely sweet tasting skin. I heard her soft moan when I kissed her and I could feel a sudden drop in her shoulders as she relaxed.

I spent a few minutes kissing her neck and nibbling at her ears, all the time I could hear her breath getting slower as she relaxed under my ministrations. Now that she was relaxed I intended on getting her turned on.

Slowly I started to rub lower down her front, tracing the contour of her bra under her top and I felt her body start to tremble. I held my breath and without pausing I deftly undid the button of her blouse, and then the next one. Mirabella didn't stop me. Continuing down I undid all remaining buttons on her silk blouse and I returned to stroking her soft and sensitive skin.

I drifted my hand across her tits and I felt her stiff nipples through the thin material of her white lace bra. Her breathing started to get quicker when I touched her tits and I guessed she liked them being touched and was anticipating what was going to happen just as I was.

Taking my chance I swiveled the chair in which she was sitting so that she was no longer facing the table and I stood in front of her. She had her eyes averted, looking down as if she was still not sure about what was going on. I looked down at her beautiful body and saw her the soft skin of her cleavage and the young tits encased by the lace bra.

Bending over I took one of her tits in my mouth and sucked through the lace material while gently flicking my tongue over her nipple. I heard a low moan when my mouth first touched her and I knew I was getting somewhere. Encouraged, I spent some time kissing, fondling, sucking and licking her tits and she responded by moaning and trembling as she sat in my kitchen.

Emboldened I reached round and undid her bra, pulling the cups down to reveal her young tits. And what wonderful tits they were; soft, smooth and pert as they stood there without the support of the bra. Eagerly I returned to my sucking and licking and she moaned louder at the touch of my mouth and tongue on her bare young tits.

Still touching and kissing her tits, I eased myself down so I was kneeling, and carefully moved between her legs, gently forcing her legs apart as I moved closer so she didn't notice in her excitement. I couldn't resist touching her long sexy legs and I softly slid my hands up the outside of her legs, and then the inside. Her body quivered when I touched her legs and she unconsciously shifted forward in the chair, her body seemingly eager to get closer to me.

I slipped my hands up, under her mini skirt and stroked higher on the inside of her soft thighs. My own heart was beating faster now that I was getting closer to my prize. She was wearing matching white lace panties and I dragged my finger across her pussy over the thin fabric. I felt her voluntarily spread her legs wider and she moved against my hand now that she was so turned on from my attention to her tits.

I pushed and rubbed around her pussy entrance, her lace panties getting wet as I pressed them into her slit. She was moaning again, her ass shifting in the chair as she tried to get more of my touch. Deftly I moved her panties to one side to open up her pussy to my hands. Now I stroked her bare pussy with my hands and I was surprised to find that she was shaved and smooth. Her moans were louder and I rubbed up and down her pussy, spreading her juices that gave away her excitement.

Bending down I brought my head close to her pussy and I breathed in deeply, inhaling the delicious aroma of young pussy. I moved even closer and licked her pussy, and she tasted wonderful. Finding her clit I discovered that it was engorged and I licked around it before sucking on it gently. At my touch she gave out a yelp, and then a slow moan and her hips bucked as she moved against my tongue.

Suddenly I felt her pussy clamp even tighter around my fingers and then her pussy started to pulse around them. I heard her cry out "Oh my God, yessss" and she screamed as I continued to lick her clit.

Her orgasm seemed to last for minutes as she squirmed against me, forcing my fingers deeper, until she gradually slumped back onto her chair and relaxed.

I brought my fingers out of her pussy and I straightened my back, looking up at her. I saw a contented look on her pretty face and her eyes were half closed with a half smile on her red lips.

Mirabella opened her gorgeous eyes and looked at me, "I...I...never knew it could be like that," she sighed.

I grinned back at her "And that is just the start."

She opened her eyes wider wondering what was going to happen, but she didn't move away or tell me to stop

Mirabella was still slumped back in the kitchen chair with her blouse fallen open revealing her uncovered pert tits. She was still breathing heavily.

I stood up and reached out and, holding her small hands in my hands, I pulled her to her feet. Her brow frowned under her blonde her and I could tell she was puzzled at what was going to happen next. I quickly sat down in the chair she had vacated and she turned to face me.

"Kneel down Mirabella,", I ordered, "it is your turn to help me."

"I've not, you know, touched a man there with my mouth before, Mark".

"Just kneel down Mirabella, it will come naturally." I assured her, my cock hardening even more at the thought of being the first to have my cock in her young mouth.

I guided her down so she was kneeling between my legs at my feet. Mirabella looked up at me,Taking the lead I unbuckled my belt and unzipped my pants and reached in and pulled out my almost erect cock. I held my cock there, and Mirabella looked down, staring at my 7 inched rifle. Reaching out she wrapped her small pretty hand around the shaft of my hard cock. Her hand was so soft on my cock and I could feel the blood pumping into my cock as I swelled up larger at her touch. Mirabella started pumping her hand up and down on my cock and I was surprised at how firmly she gripped my cock until I realized that she had obviously had given a handjob before because she seemed so confident.

When my cock was fully erect I motioned to Mirabella to bend down. Obeying me she leaned over my cock and I had a wonderful view down her front as her pert tits fell completely free of her blouse. Gently she kissed the tip of my cock and in return it jumped. Giggling, Mirabella kissed my cock again and it jumped again. It felt wonderful when her soft lips touched the sensitive head of my hard cock.

"Take it into your mouth, Mirabella ," I urged her.

Smiling at me she pulled back the foreskin from my hard cock and bent over it again. This time she opened her mouth and slid her red lips over my cock, drawing it into her small mouth. 

She then took my cock further into her mouth, sliding her red lips down the shaft until the end of my cock hit the back of her mouth. Slowly she moved back, her lips tight around me as she let my hard cock pop out of her mouth. Then she started a great rhythm on my cock as she fucked me with her mouth, all the time looking at me with her sexy eyes while I watched my cock appear and then disappear into her young mouth. Mirabella started to gently play with my balls while she sucked me and I could feel my cum starting to rise in my cock.

"I'm going to cum," I said quietly although my breathing was getting faster with the exquisite touch of her mouth and tongue on my cock.

My fuck date 20

I felt the walls choke on my dick and pulsed while she squeezed her inner walls on me. I groaned in delight and kissed her neck.. Fuck.."work that cunt on me.." Fuck.. I lost control i slammed into her deeply. Deep into her warmth... She screamed and came apart in my arms.."oooooh.." She moaned.. I came at that sound. Spewed all my bottled up cum in her.. I could feel her womb clench it.. Trying to swallow it all up. Fuck I spurted deep in her..

My fuck date 19

With the supervision of Emem, we had a great kiss, my hands ran through her body, i felt the very smooth and soft skin, body to body we were stuck on the lamp table, still as Emem wants it. I roamed my hand's through her breast, the expression on Uduak's face confirmed to me that we are not kissing because job required so, we reveled in the moment!

My fuck date 18

Fred
Past month have been the juciest part of my diary, memoirs upon memoirs are in litany on different dates, the day on the plane have indeed turned a blessing. I and Uduak are having something that you can from a distance call a honeymoon, her company is bright, informative and progressive. We got through the audtion her aunt offered, I will be taking a role! who would have ever thought about it? that my first shot at movie making will be on the Emem Ottong's set?! My mom is right again, of course, I am loving Calabar!

My fuck date 17

Uduak
The biggest thing is about to happen, a call came through from my aunt while I was in my crush's class, she called me to check my mail soon and reply accordingly as soon as I can. she said also that I should inform Fred who I am with in one of the school's restaurant. we opened our mails respectively and it was a request from her company for a movie audition!
the happiness on Fred's face was priceless, he literally froze in amazement and I could see his eye bags filled with water but he managed to control the eyes situation! I was glad to share and be part of the moment with him, it seems to be something he longed for.

My fuck date 16

Fred
Maybe this is out of place to do as Etido my friend is telling me, but I am craving to visit my student crush. it is long overdue, we are now too intertwined, I saw it inappropriate to invite her to my place which is a staff quarters, but she asked for it as a reward of acing one of her very core courses.

My fuck date 15

I answered with a smile correcting her pronunciation of Calabar with British accent. we blended well in talking and I tried as much as I can not to bring the Lecturer to student vibe into the very smooth conversation,
She relayed to me more about herself, I got to know she came all the way to Calabar for the sake of Cinematography and filming, this fact further soften the spot I have for the vibrant lady, just like me; she knows what she wants, she also has an enabling environment.

My fuck date 14

Fred
I decided to chill out today to at least mark my arrival in Calabar, already mingled a little with some of the staff in my department.. Made friend with Etido, he seem to be cooler than others, he have hinted me on the best and most popular spot to go.

My fuck date 13

Uduak
Nursing the rage from the incident three years ago have been frustrating, I like the sex but don't want to drop my guard! I don't like Duke enough to want to be his baby's mom. what was I thinking? I have been horribly angry at him and I hate it; I want more litany of sex like that but he ruined my urge, I just hope I am not pregnant.

My fuck date 12

Fred
Damn, I never thought I will see that face again, and also in the most compromising position there is. I struggled really hard to get through the class, how much damage will this girl cause me?

My sexy new roommate🔞

My former room mate Luke from last year was gone and had been replaced by a pretty freshman named Judy, i really missed Luke but didn't mind Luke's absence after Judy and I got very comfortable around each other.

My fuck date 11

I was scared for a minute because I have never in my fucked up life seen a penis this long.. with sturdy looking veins decorating it, poised like a snake ready to strike.
He laid hot and heavy and he was rubbing the tip to get to work.. He oozed a bit of precum. The pearly drop made my mouth water..

My fuck date 10

Uduak
I cannot help myself. The night is getting quiet and the only noise disturbing is our very audible murmur.. we are lying down on the very broad and furry center rug, he was lying horizontally at my feet. Consistently, my legs felt his laps, athletic and hairy..

My fuck date 9

"Can't this driver be bold enough to just barge in?" I thought within me! I imagined him slamming the door open and forcing his way into me. Fuck.. My fingers flew faster on my pussy. The thought of him fucking me and doing those crazy shii to me pushed me over the edge.
The tears of cum rolled down my thighs and the sensational storm calmed. Still.. I didnt feel satisfied. I got out, applied my to-bed cosmetics and joined Duke the driver downstairs with high hopes that something will happen!

My fuck date 8

Uduak

I got a call from my aunt and she gave reasons as to why she couldn't be around in person to pick me. She advised that I feel at home, she already had pizza ordered for me, all of these is tandem to the fact that she won't be coming home till the following day.

My fuck date 7

Fred

It is obvious the lady from the plane was sent to torment me, she can't in anyway be my crush, I came out barely 15mins after the caring rendezvous in the air and there she was all wrapped up in the hands of another man, all in complicit positions!

My fuck date 6

Fred
I got to the airport eventually, not early enough but right on time to avoid any brouhaha for the non-refundable I have with me; activities are going on intensely but with an overwhelming silence, just machine beeping, keyboard chattering and teller prints disturbing the silence therein, I got my ticket endorsed, "seat number 34" the dark slim lady at the counter told me.

My fuck date 5

Fred

Up early and out in my friend's car to the airport, my flight is 10am but because of the tireless traffic in Lagos, I want to be in the airport's vicinity early enough so nothing will stall me. My good friend is my driver and his joy in doing this for me was very palpable, countless times, he professed how much he is happy for me. He was sure this has in it, more blessing than I envisaged.

It was seeming like my mom hired him to do this because he really sounds like her. My over caring mother on the other hand kept calling and texting, torrents of prayers was unleashed on me and my lips is getting tired of saying amen, her co-pastors also saw it good to call me and release yet another tsunami of prayers on me. Their prayers had something in common, they all included in it that i get also a good girl in Calabar like I have gotten a good job there, the same thing Ndifreke was telling me as he drove.

My fuck date 4

Uduak

Jeez! Finally in the very popular Muritala Mohammed Airport in Lagos; Thirteen hours felt like 13years on the very miserable flight; I sat next to a coughing patient and it was just too horrible an experience. I couldn't complain because then; I will be the sociopath and anti-humanity brute, I had to take it all.

My fuck date 3

Fred

After getting all the necessaries from the school such as my plane ticket, I packed up immediately. It is unprofessional to stall the school and since I am now a staff, there is a status-quo I must abide by..

My fuck date 2

Uduak
I am here packing up my bags to journey back to Nigeria, my country but I am not sure I can call it home. I have stayed here in the United kingdom for twenty years, going back is both exciting and depressing simultaneously. I thought of going there to learn in detail about the culture and norms so as to project it in moving pictures, it is my way of standing distinct amidst the very competitive environment I am in; theater arts is a big deal here in the UK, so one need a strong and formidable symbol that will single you out as Unique. An excellent edge is needed.

My fuck date

Fred
Life as a struggling actor can be frustrating which clearly explains the meaning of struggle. Those days you go hungry just so you get transport fare for auditions, those demeaning things one had to do to make career ends meet, no cash was coming in but the joy of doing what you love maximized the utility I craved for.

Colors of His Mind

Colors Of Your Mind

Take a walk inside of his mind filled with colors and swirls of imagination  
Floating, colorful thoughts waiting to be formed into another creation
Dizzying cyclones of emotions  that cause exciting weather
Causing storms that rain words that run and mix together
A pathway into his mind that could lead into limitless love
Where your heart grows wings and soars in the clouds above
It could be dark with rain that turns to ice of black daggers thrown 
Where pain and sorrow rip your flesh open to the bone
There are many cycles and phases that you'll wander through
Some may even overwhelm you and your heart they will consume
A wondrous swirling river of thoughts and emotions ride
Ride a thing that constantly spins that he calls his mind
Slinging words in each and every direction known
And then into words his soul's colors are sewn
Sewn into the poems that he so freely write 
Sending out waves of darkness or rainbow filled light
Never will his mind become a desolate or dry place
It will forever be filled with wonder that can never be erased

Happy Birthday Dafidi 

Nessa loves you 

A sip 5

"Amma bout to cum" the words escape from your lips and u aren't even aware. 

I chuckle deep within me, i say welcome to the land whose existence you seem not to have been made aware. 

Like target practice, you hit my face with all of your juice. 

A beautiful fountain, there you lay, hyperventilating with sounds like a track produced by juls. 

You smile shyly towards me, ur legs still trembling. 

I smile to myself, seemingly saying "WehDoneSir

A sip 4

Your reply ever so invigorating, "Amma let the neighbors know ur name".

I find that G, and i play them softly like strings. 

Sensual music, ur back up... giving that marvin gaye feeling. 

A few more strokes, my rhythm upped... like am in a poker room card dealing. 

A sip 3

My Tongue does a 360 on your clit, Your moan is up a notch... music to my ears in a rhythm ever so pulsating. 

My hands begin an adventure, searching for the spot with a G on it. 

"Keep it down baby" i whisper, in a bid to keep u tame. 

A sip 2

So much sass, increasing my urge to thread the needle. 

Your eyes shut in anticipation, only the spirits see what i'n about to do. 

Your Toes curl, leading to a proportional increase in warmth and moist. 

No flag can fly at half mast with you, my soldiers got mine fully on hoist. 

A sip 1

One leg in d east.. the other in the west, directly facing your equator, bluntly staring in its face...

It opens up, am bout to exchange kisses wit both of ur labias... hoping to swim in its pool with heavenly rhythmic pace...

Its a no grass zone, a perfect haircut giving it a yummy face. 

It calls with poise and grace. 

Do Not 'HIGH' 5 The Syrup Clan.

Meditate... Meditate... Meditate...
Instead of Medicate... Medicate... Medicate.
It's about 8 in the AM, but 'eyes never clear for Kate'.
She's on a dosage that the physician never signed off on.
One Benylin and sprite twice or thrice daily gives her the feeling that she's sailing.
But to where? She'll never really know.
The repercussions of this seed she doesn't really know.
The god of addiction has struck her with his arrow that flew at a nasty angle off his bow.
So now all she sees is slow, all her brain aches for is that numbness ... It's at a stage she can't control.
Her journey into the 'rup clan was smooth and steady.
10 dwarfie bottles in a party standing next to 10 mighty carbonated bottle of drinks.
A chemistry titration where the titre value is how high can we go.
The indicator... The slow feeling knocked upon to the brain.
Here all the pain seems to go away.
Like the prodigal son going even more astray.
Never to return... As the journey to an unknown land has begun without the Sojourner even taking notice.
Somebody say No please.
The backdoor escape for suffering or psychological trauma is not codeine.
Yet I live In a society where disruptive behaviour disorder is termed as evil and demonic spirits.
Split personality disorder is ogbanje or mammy water.
'Well, wetin man wan do'... This is Nigeria.
'Coda bottles full all of the area'.
All of the time a young lad or lass feels caged, one of their peer passes him the lean... We slowly killing ourselves, Kung-Fu kicks to our ribcages.
It's now a recreational beverage.
The further they climb, the harder it is to withdraw.
Soon enough the camel's back is broken with the last straw.
Those pullings the strings of the addicted are the winners and like the Champions League final, there are no draws.
They are the clan, dangling the cheese of codeine in front of addicted mice.
They fail to provide a platform.
Yet cry wolf for the same minds they have deformed.
They pump money into the business on code.
Reaping in back, ripping us off like flesh off toads.
Yet, this is a story which would never be told.
They love us dead in the head just to get ahead.
Yes... That goes for your dead beat pharmacies who leak the ish behind curtains.
You know the drawbacks, yet with that same cane you flog our bare backs.
Lean would never get fatter if the clan close the channels.
It booms because they provide the funnels.
Yet they want accolades for banning said drugs, when we know it's a ploy to jack up the price of said drugs on the street.
More coins in their money bags, shamefully for them that's lit.
This again is Nigeria.
Abeg, do not high 5 the syrup clan.

NOW, THE PAST AND THE FUTURE UNDER A SHOWER.

It's 5:33 PM and rain drops are crashing on my window.
I'm in the shower where I often think the most clear and the world often spins slow.
Big Brother's wedding is in a lil' bit, all I can think 'bout is what if it was me getting hooked for life.
David Asikpata Omoighoje found a woman and he found a wife.
It sends a shiver down my spine and now I know probably how big brother must be feeling.
Alittle nervous I suppose.
A life long commitment whom no one can oppose.
The water takes a journey to the bathroom floor via my torso and I begin to imagine my own wedding.
I don't really dig it big, but it's her day so lets bang the drums and make loud sounds.
From the altar I gaze upon the aisle and behold she emerges in flowing white.
If the choir could sing EdSheeran's perfect it would magnificent, I'm by the altar in a burgundy suit with black lapels thinking to myself that my queen is indeed a beautiful sight.
I'm focused on her and somehow the congregation fades away.
In my head am reciting my vows, hoping to spit 'em like a rappers bars when I finally say 'em.
It is such bliss which I can't just waste with just any miss.
My mind drifts to the women who would probably point to me and say I led them on.
I put it all on the table before we went ahead to do what thou wilt.
For most of them I'd probably say it's a shame our love went on tilt.
No fault of mine that's why I always tried to keep it real.
Like a highlight reel it all flashes in front of my face.
She who would point fingers at me forgetting we were often cut up by so many states.
We desired each other and of cos we were knee deep on something akin to what y'all call love.
She always thought she was in the boat alone, and I like a puppet master joyfully pulled her strings.
I guess at my wedding that would all be in the past and like Prince Harry I'd joyfully invite my ex-es without bad blood.
The reception gonna be lit and something tells me by that time I'd be into roses for some wierd reason.
Dance Dance Dance Season.
I sure hope she can rock the dance floor else that would mean I'd be taking two trophies home.
It's 6:13, I am fully clothed now, legs crossed on my study table.
I can solely conclude now and this is in no way a fable.
Love is sweet and weddings are always beautiful.

SEGUN MY NEIGHBOR (An Old Man's Tale)

A lady started visiting four days ago, a dark, slim, coke-body lady, she is about 6''1 in height and relatively beautiful. Segun was extra happy to see her, he screamed her name from the balcony, "Temiloluwa!" - he sounded so romantic, I was almost convinced that the lady was the special one, the lady, on the other hand, dropped her bag in euphoria, jumped to hug Segun, she seem genuinely happy, her smile as bright as the sun, reminds me of my favorite daughter Tolu. Segun dragged me out of my delusion when he registered his signature aggressive breast squeezing, I was not disappointed. It took shorter than longer to hear the sexual noise, this new girl is indeed a noise maker, her voice was as loud as Tina Turner, I turned to check if my nanny heard the noise, she didn't, frozen in the poorly produced movie, laughing hysterically at their whack dialogues - she was totally unperturbed. Temiloluwa tormented me with her noise
"yes yes yes, right there, don't stop" were few among the words I could hear clearly, my impaired ears had no choice. I think some other things have been added to sex in this age, women in my days were silent moaners, something like a burning stove, we did the noise making.

Temiloluwa left at dusk, I overheard him trying to convince her to stay, they talked so loudly like I was some breathing corpse, they are unaware the amount of info they carelessly blowing out.

Temiloluwa coming became a regularity, the following day, she came earlier, at about 9am when I was just settling in for my balcony viewing, they could not wait to get in, he carried her like a child, kissed her as he bounced her ass against his crotch! Weirdos! The noise torment came early and she left again at dusk.

Yesterday blew my mind, This two children of the devil had sex in the car, there were in the car blasting the stereo playing some fast beat music with a peculiar dance, she was trying to teach Segun, the dance has funny moves but it is quite interesting, she called it Shaku Shaku, that the last I checked meant "remains" - it is not a good word to describe anything, I wonder why an interesting dance could be named after it. She danced continuously till Segun could catch up with the dance and together, they choreographed it, I was happy to see that Mr Segun to was doing something other than sex till the two miscreants turned the dance into some erotic affair, Temiloluwa launched the erotic moves, pressing her ass seductively against his crotch, Segun not knowing what to do - simply pressed back! The move became intense, even my own old, wrinkled and weak penis began to act funny, they began to kiss, opened the back seat of the car, continued in the kissing, Temi already was without pant, both of them on getting in the car, an instant bouncy movement launched from the car. That could mean only one thing - Sex (in broad daylight and in front of a watching old man). I find it unfair and immoral but they don't care, lull from the playing stereo will let you know how loud the girl is with feigned noises. The left at dusk on this day too.

My granddaughter from Tolu (everyone call her Lolu) was said to be arriving from the U.K, seeing all I saw with Segun, I vowed to make sure she stays far away from the Magodo abode, at least somewhere I won't have to see her been a prey to the likes of ignoramus like Segun. I do not have a clear picture of Lolu, I saw her last as a child the last time I visited, She is twenty-two now, growing fast, she pestered her mother that she wants to come and see me, after long; Tolu agreed which is why she is got to the next plane to Nigeria.

I was asleep when my grand-daughter came in, I woke early in the morning today, got cleaned by my useless nanny and I looked forward, I was sitting as usual in my wheelchair in the living room being fed pap and milk. I ate a lot of it since it is probably going to be my only meal of the day. Lolu came through and knelt in front of me, it was first blurring as I raised my eyes to behold her...

I saw my granddaughter and I almost died, I coughed severely, everyone wondered why, my body shook hard and I had goosebumps all over me, it was TemiLOLUwa from the past three days. I was taken away as commanded by my daughter to get cleaned as I have puked all over myself, the young girl had the most pretentious face and it is killing me. The miscreant I have been watching for the past three days is my own blood?

I cannot take it, I am getting rush from this event, it unfathomable, I am running nuts, I don't have the ears of my family, none of them have the patience to listen to my shaky, weak and tiring talks. Oh! what old age has done to me! Trying to tell them will either end in bickering arguments or taken frivolously as they will take it that I am hallucinating or just blame something on old age. I can only reach Tolu her mother on the grant of my last daughter. I don't want Segun to continue body hitting my daughter, I cannot have it! SOMEBODY HELP ME.

SEGUN MY NEIGHBOR (An Old Man's Tale)

It is not fun being old, it strips you off so many things, even the right to be involved in the lives of your wards. I am a 94years old man, with a weak spine, thus I am usually either laid on my bed or sitting or seated in my wheelchair. My wife died six years back, I guess she got tired of old age and its excesses, I have been alone ever since, sickened with partial stroke, my hearing deteriorated early this year, I am something close to hapless if not for the full house I do have twice a day. I am a man with a lot of kids, I have a dozen of them - three legally, others from external affairs, blame it on the lone and psyche duty of being a soldier. I created wealth for myself the way I can, fortunately for me, they were legal, I was a soldier in an era where serving your country was a noble and gainfully employed job. You can move up in ranks make good money, if managed well; it could become a long time wealth considering the value and purchasing power of the Naira at that time. I was a property freak so I have a credible number of properties, I am a proud ten house owner in various state spread in the country. Good rent money from this houses helped me see my children through school, most of them are gainfully employed individuals but these harsh times cannot aid me to certify if their wealth is legal.

I am stationed in my favorite house in the Magodo residency of the opulent Lagos, a four bedroom flat in the uppercase with few apartments downstairs which I rent to Lagosians in need. Magodo is a rich neighborhood with few international standard amenities, compared to the recently built houses in the area; mine is an old building. Old as it may, it still a valuable asset and a good money making machine annually. 

A new tenant came in just last month, his name is Segun, dark, bearded and with a lot of athletic features, I did not like him at all, it was a trust issue, I have a tenacious instinct that construed to be a harm to my house but my over-sabi last daughter accepted him into the house without even seeking my permission, I guess I am too old to even own my property. I suspect her drastic acceptance of the young man is based on looks and the exotic Mercedez Benz smart car that he drove in; that made him an instant tenant, the type she will want to be around. During my heyday, I will ask the nature of the job of any prospective tenant, I will go to his claimed workplace to confirm, use my military orientation to ensure that he is not a potential harm, I even make the tenants' sign undertaking. All of my measures of hitch-free control of affairs is considered archaic and have long been thrown in the lagoon. It is why all sort of madness occur but old age has hindered me, I am too weak, the only strength I have to just sit back and watch.

Since my daughter was dumb enough to accept someone I detest, I took it upon myself to put an eye on Sege as he loves to call himself. When my families are not around all day, I am kept in the balcony, the useless nanny will equip me early in the day with all she believe I will need and just go about watching the Africa Magic Yoruba channel on the cable, she pays zero attention to, she gets so engulfed with the movie and literally forget I exist till my folks are back, at that time, she began an annoying eye-service, pampering me like a little child. I cannot complain, my speech is deterred by my partial stroke, my folks will pay her handsomely at the end of the month for a job wickedly done. Due to this, I assume that I am home alone till my children are back at dusk.

From the said balcony though, I have an eagle, I see so many things that you cannot imagine, virtually everything happening in my environment, only if these people can seek my contribution and be patient enough to read my mumbling speech. I began to watch Segun closely, he settled in good, he was a loud person, if he is not playing loudly in his apartment, he plays the highly provocative music through his sleek car stereo, he drinks a lot too, I sometimes perceive some funny odour from his apartment, this odour comes on the hot of day when no one is around, I am yet to determine what it is exactly. Segun hardly goes out, he wakes at noon, I doubt if he sleeps all through the night, on some days, he will be at the veranda and be on his computer for hours, I mean long hours with utmost seriousness. I asked my daughter what kind of job has such as suspicious ethic, she answered with a wide range of what it could be, leaving me with nothing definite to believe, her equivocal answer did not satisfy my curiosity, in fact, it fuelled it.

Some days are happy days for Segun, he will have friends come around, they will have a very lavish but homely celebration, this party will traditionally get bigger as more friends will come with girls in their dozens, alcoholic drinks strongly present, they will order food, smoke something from a hose and cylinder ( I do not know what it is called), the  daily odour I perceive on these party days get konk and almost choking. Their happiness can be likened to a newly won war, they have a phrase that is in a loop all through the party - "cash out king'' is the phrase. This party ends with girls getting cash for attending, some girls are taken away like some souvenirs, the young men get horribly drunk especially when they take cough syrups, I think there is a wide-spread of a cough amongst young men in this time, they will struggle to  go to their various homes, Segun, on the other hand, is left with minimum of two girls as his own portion of the shared female. I suspect the mediocrely beautiful and attractive girls are those that don't get to be booked.

Aside from party days, Segun is a serial fornicator, by counts, I have seen him with thirty-two girls in the forty-four days. It is a despicable situation especially when three different girls will come at intervals on a particular day. I wonder how he gets them, his most fondest activity is when he walks to the gate to joyfully open the gate for his 'happy' prey, pay the cab driver and greet me as they saunter into his apartment (I need to mention that he fondle on this ladies breast in a way due to being regarded as abused, only girls with good breast and well-moulded buttocks come to see Segun). Few minutes after the grand reception, it is high octave noises that break the divine peace of Magodo. Loud moans definitely from sexual intercourse. I wonder where he gets the strength for so many females, I cannot judge him so much, I was for the girls back in the days but compared to Segun; I feel like an amateur. Those girls are either making those noises from good stroking or for the good pay they are bound to get after the rendevouz.

My void 5

The day I answere all these Questions is the day I know my true porpose of existence
So I turn around..

My void 4

Then it occoured to me, even nothing is something.
The gate, nothing ever comes through there,

My void 3

Hoping that all that was lost would someday emerge
My body, tired of waiting, the burden of hoping...

My void 2

I once had hope
My soul, lost with the wind of darkness..

My void 1

There I stand, at the gate
Hoping that soon is I shall be let in..

THE NEW ADDICTION

I feel ill, a sickness of thumbing my phone.
I'm inside the internet, a home that's different from my own.
My hands are itchy, my data is out but somehow my phone is in my hands... I guess my Phone is sticky.
It's hard to admit but am addicted to living in this digital space where the earth is compressed into a global village.
I'm more connected than I once was, yet I've become more disconnected.
It's a paradox and yes it sucks, but I can't help but thumb away all day like my hands and phone were together in cuffs and locks.
Initially I had failed to realize it.
I've got every information literally at my fingertips, a swipe or a click.
My favourite stars don't only shine at night, even at daylight, they are always within sight.
So I follow their trail wishing their life was mine, coming to conclusion that my life was probably swine.
I'm now a stalker, in one hand I've got johnnie walker whilst drooling over melanin beauties and light skin damsels.
On it alot sells.
With a click those fresh pairs of sneaks could be on my feet.
On it there's coins in the pockets of business owners, but there's manipulation too... Pulling strings for Maximum profits, consumer's money has gone down the loo.
I'm synced to my phone like a google app, it's eating my time like a tasty snack... It's like cheese to mice, I'm in a very big trap.
I can't pullout and can't stand the withdrawal symptoms.
It would be like time traveling to the stone age, no one even reads hard covers anymore, it's so much work to flip a page.
I'm red with rage Knowing I've caught this bug, Feeling manipulated by Mr Zuckerberg.
The advance in tech has seemed to cause a wreck.
The negatives are clouding the positives, maybe going back to the garden would be safer? With my pelvic region covered by broad leaves.

So then How do I go on?
Knowing I'm in digital chains, my very consciousness orchestrated by what I assimilate.
Is it too late?
Do I just follow its tides oblivious of the location of shore.
It's all some sort of blur, I never knew how I got here.
The bigger question with a fat elephant in the room is... How do I get out?

Damned

As she did every night she sat at her window
Hoping to heavens the ghost of her daddy would be bestowed
Losing him so early in her life was an unbearable pain
Her heart left feeling like it had been slain
Slain with the blade of death which took her forever love
Looking up to the Heaven's asking why to God above
Every night as she sat at that window she cried tears of loneliness 
Longing for one last touch or one last gentle hug
As time passed on her daddy's ghost never did show
So she made a deal with the devil that resided in Hell below
She promised him she'd live in eternal damnation by his side
If she could just see her daddy oh just one more time
The next night as she sat next to the window in waiting
The devil knew that her happiness would be worth his parading
Parading of his deception that he presented and won her soul
But the devil presented himself as her father as a fake mould
She cried with happiness rejoicing in his presence 
But soon she started to realize that this wasn't her daddy's essence
Then the devil revealed his horrible face to her
Telling her that she sold her soul and would now forever burn
She hung her head in shame and begged as she wept
But the wicked devil of Hell took her soul and left

His sister my adeola 5

The gist was lit AF! And time flied like a saucer tearing up air resistance. Then it hit me, Adeola was still in the eoom and she must be uncomfortable AF. I had to think of a way to discharge this niggas.