1. The Bat🍆
This dick is so big, TOO big, even for people who love a nice big dick. A bat dick is fat and moderately to extremely long, and when faced with the reality of this dick you either feel joy or a sense of impending doom, like “Oh god what am I doing.”
Your guy probably either feels really confident about his bat dick or he’s really self-conscious about it..and public boners are a real source of anxiety/embarrassment for him.
Most importantly, guys with bat dicks need to know what to do with them.
2. The Boomerang🍄
You’re making out with a hot new guy and everything’s going well and then you get down to his dick and…wait what?😧
It curves to the side or has some other type of irregular positioning and you start to wonder whether sex is even feasible with this type of dick. 😒
But luckily your guy has lived with this dick all his life, and if he knows what he's doing he can work with his angles and make it feel amazing.
3. The Late Bloomer🍋
A late bloomer is the kind of dick you pull out and it looks small, like really small, and you’re like thinking that this is going to be the worst sex ever.
Then he gets harder. And it grows bigger. And bigger. And bigger. And then you have a full slab of meat in your hands or in your mouth or wherever you are putting it.😂😂😂 fills like a baloon.
4. The Guy You Can’t Believe Is So Huge🍖🍖
There are all sorts of ways people try to guess whether a guy is going to be hung or not: shoe size, hand size, height, the length of his fingers.
But the reality is that you can never know how big a guy’s dick is until you see it for real. Photographic evidence can be doctored, so don't trust it.
This kinda guy surprises you!
5. Eew Dick😷
I think there's a thing going around where some guys don't wash their dicks, or they don't wash them all the way, or I don't even know. There is no excuse for a dick that makes you go Eew. NONE.✌ abeg, scrub scrub scrub😂.