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Thursday, 26 April 2018

Not Sure

Image result for image of paintingsWhen he says you're beautiful, you second guess Yourself... probably because the beauty fools.
And when he looks you in the eyes and professes "i can't think straight w'out you", you shudder in disbelief... You can't even imagine that you got what it takes to lock a man down like that.
You say to yourself "it's all crap", No man ain't never gon' fall for a lady like that.
They all love the different kinds of chocolate, why then be stuck with the kitkat?
You might think "he wouldn't love me for me... I'm too razz".
Or that he's too sophisticated, and i don't even listen to jazz.
I barely say a word or two when i slide in his DM, how am i gonna keep his eye on the prize when he's away.

Plus im afraid of these "snap-girls", even with flowers on my head i don't slay.
let not my deficiencies pave the way.
Image result for image of paintings'Coz these leeches be looking for whom to latch onto.
And i don't fvck like porn too, am all for missionary... wouldn't he leave me for a chic more exotic?"
Many insecurities be all up in your head.
Hence you question every move you make.
And for each of his statements, you've already made two alternate conclusions.
You draw him close, you push him away... these opposite forces got you stuck in an equilibrium.
And when the boat's almost sinking, you say to his face "if i never had you, i could never lose you"
But deep down you know it's all fallacy.
And it goes way deeper that the eyes can see.
You still very much caught up in love waters, like being high on the sea.
And that infact describes you in perfection, a captain of her ship who has committed a mutiny against herself.
She's arranged and scattered her shelf.
She's Alice in wonderland, yet still gets sucked into the depths like sunderland.
Intelligent and yet dyslexic.
She's everyman's dream, and her own nightmare.
"I love you but we can't be together", "I want you to touch me, but i ain't coming over".
Queen kills pawn, bishop nails Queen.
A disgruntled game of chess, but she checkmates herself every time.
But the truth is he doesn't care if you're poetic or if you fluff every rhyme.
You're a world class chef or maybe sometimes you forget to add thyme.
All he wants is a pillar for the times he would crumble.
A shield to hide his weakness, a firm hand to correct him when he strays from meekness.
But how can you be all of these if you're unsure?
How'd you expect to be a shoulder to lean on, if your foundations are shaky?
You tell him your feelings in Klingon, but he ain't one of those extraterrestrial beings on star-trek and you expect him to understand?
Where would the drive come from if you fuel your engines with sand?
You're pretty inside out, but can't stand
some acne or rash on your skin.
"OMG I'm ugly, can't go out any more wit Akin"
Hence your happiness is tainted by your every action and those you fail to take.
You want to eat it, you want to have it... that same cake?
The key is not to invite pressure on yourself.
Be free, take a stand, make mistakes.
'Coz the baker wouldn't know the right amount of flour to use, if he didn't dabble with different amounts first.
You're unique in your way, who says only one flavour can quench a thirst.
So there's no reason for self doubt, or looking back... you don't want to end up like the wife of lot.
So if of the lot he chose you, then there's no reason to fret.
There's no reason to fidget.
Just hang in there like a widget.
For if he doesn't adore you for who you are, then there's someone out there who will.
Never ever be "unsure"

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